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No, that’s not the list of what I want to have at some point in my life. That’s the sacrifice list for good fortune in the World Cup today. Right now, we have a 20% chance of getting to the second round. There are a lot of problems to over come in order to do this though.
First, we have to win. A tie or a loss and we’re talking about choking yet again on the European stage. Quite frankly, I’m getting tired of playing strong games everywhere but in Europe, which we treat like it is a mens shower stall in prison. “Ooops, dropped the soap again!”
Next, just like in ‘02, we are depending on another game assuming that we win (where’d I let that brat run off to?). Italy must beat the Czechs in order for the US to have a good shot. If it is a tie, we have to go to goal differential with the Czech’s and we are at -4 right now. This means that we need to beat Ghana by 5 goals to go in over the Czech’s.
In our game, Ghana is missing two of their top offensive forces due to yellow cards. Hooray! Oh wait, we’re missing two of our top defensive forces due to yellow/red cards. Boo! The question is whether our offense can get off their asses and make something of playing in the opponents half of the field for a majority of the time and yet not have a single goal to show for it. (Own goals don’t count, bitches.) With a grand total of 2 shots on goal for two games, prospects aren’t looking too good against a very strong Ghana team.
Finally, where are our soccer hotties? We need some more luscious babe (NSFW ) support… (*cough* see below for other countries support…)
But, I’m going to be watching on the edge of my seat anyways to the very end. You’re not really a soccer fan until you’ve had your heart broken in a World Cup… Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go do my part for our success.
wanders off to slaughter the child
PS. Whatever you do, don’t click more!
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